It does get easier over time. Thankfully my only run in with her AP was of my own accord. My D-Day was on a Thursday afternoon and Monday morning I drove to her workplace and had a 20-minute face-to-face conversation with him
There was zero anger in me because I was just a shell of a man at this point. It was a great speech. Basically I said I thought I was doing everything to make her happy and I thought she was but she wasn't and instead of coming to me she turned to you, another man, to make her feel good about herself
I'm sure he was uncomfortable because he is a police officer assigned to work at the high school. I walked in, asked the receptionist to speak to the rso, she asked for my ID so she instantly knew I was the husband of a co-worker, she paged him down to the office, he strutted it in with his gun his badge his vest his flat top haircut, smiling, said how can I help you and I said is there somewhere we can talk
At this point he didn't know who I was but when we walked out into the foyer I said my name is and I am so and so's husband. The smile left his face and he stuck out his hand and said I owe you an apology and I just waved him off. I said I'm not here for an apology and that's when I started my 20 minute speech
Honestly my hope was that my words would resonate with him and he would stop fooling around with married women and another married guy wouldn't have 27 years of his life destroyed but it was a foolish hope because after my wife he moved on to the social worker and ended up banging her not only in his car but on her desk inside the school
My wife's job provides the health insurance for our family and as a father I have to put my kids first so instead of telling her to quit and find another job I had to deal with her going to work knowing he was there. I think this went on for over a year and every God damn time I had to go to that school for something my stress level would go through the ceiling
When my middle boy graduated we went to the school for the ceremony and he was there. My wife says she didn't see him but I certainly did
5 months after D-Day I reached out to his wife and told her what was going on. She was devastated because this wasn't his first affair and while this was going on she was waiting to have surgery to find out if she had breast cancer. What a great husband
Several months after that she told me he was up for a promotion which would take him out of the school and that made me feel better. But every time I'm driving and I see a police car from that municipality my first thought "is he driving that car."
When my 14-year-old freshman graduates in 3.5 years I will never again have to set foot in that building. I used to love volunteering for events there but her affair robbed me of that as well. Until then every time I have to go there for an event I am reminded the entire time I am there
[This message edited by WB1340 at 11:34 AM, Saturday, February 7th]
